In a recent confession shared to @meinmokhtar, who reposted it to his X (formerly Twitter) account, a man named Tom (pseudonym) talks about feeling confused after his girlfriend, Emilia (pseudonym), suggested he set boundaries with his female cousin, whom he’s been close to since childhood.
Tom explained in the post how Emilia confronted him about his relationship with his cousin, Sarah (pseudonym), especially when Sarah was going through tough times.
“Should I not proceed with the engagement?”
Tom explained how he and Sarah grew up together and have always been really close and how he’s always seen her like a little sister.
He mentioned that ever since they were kids, they were used to hugging and holding hands, but they didn’t do it as much anymore until recently.
“When we got older, Sarah started opening up to me a lot, so I’d always hug and hold her hand to comfort her. Now it’s a problem because Emilia wants me to set boundaries with Sarah,” he shared.
He tried justifying himself by saying that he didn’t fully agree with Emilia’s concerns. He explained that if it was a female friend, he would understand, but since it’s his own family, he doesn’t see eye to eye with her on this.
“My parents have never told me to stop, and Sarah is fine with me doing this. Why does my girlfriend want me to stop? Emilia and I are getting engaged next week. Should I call it off because of this?”
“Am I wrong for not setting boundaries?”
Tom went on to explain that he sees Sarah as a sister and doesn’t understand why he’s not allowed to hug her when she’s struggling.
“My cousin’s dad is my uncle, and I want to be there for her when my uncle is no longer around. That’s why I feel like I can’t stop hugging her and holding her hand when she’s going through a tough time,” he said.
He added that Emilia, his future wife, confronted him about it, saying that hugging and holding hands should be reserved for spouses, parents, and siblings.
“In her eyes, Sarah is just my cousin, not my sibling. But to me, she’s like a sister. I just need someone to help me figure this out because Emilia can’t accept that Sarah is still my cousin, not a mahram.”
Emilia’s response
Emilia, who saw the confession post, decided to share her side of the story. She said,
“Tom and Sarah are definitely not mahrams, even though he sees her as his sister. He doesn’t consider Islamic rules. I’ve tried to understand him, but he hasn’t made any effort to change.”
She then questioned if it wasn’t reasonable for her to bring it up, especially after finding out that he and Sarah even slept in the same room.
“So, should I just step back now? I thought he was willing to change.”
You can read the full story here.
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