It isn’t easy to juggle both career, family and personal time but with a little help from your husband and family, some of us manage to cope pretty well. Yet, a post has gone viral on social media, where a Malaysian netizen gave detailed tips on how to be a “good wife” who works and does everything all by herself with no help from anyone, not even her husband while still being a normal functioning human being. If you ever find yourself in this situation, I’d just like to say that you’re not in a marriage, it’s more like an unpaid internship.
Social media has been blowing up and people are giving their own comments on what are frankly rather ridiculous guidelines. Twitter user @SabrinaShuhaim1 shared the post made by the woman who offered some advice on how to be the perfect wife and boy, it sounds like women should be robots instead.
15 point yang sedang hangat di kecam warga net Facebook. Baca pun penat. Kalau ini lah yang perlu mak mak hadapi setiap hari, lebih baik mak mak tidak bersuami.
Hidup bukan game, mak bukan robot. Mak juga ada rasa penat dan mahu masa untuk diri sendiri.
Lelaki yang rasa dia pic.twitter.com/Hf9XchzBPU
— Sab • Fever Glam (@SabrinaShuhaim1) February 19, 2020
She starts her “advice” by saying, “What do you do when you’re a wife who comes back from work at 6.30pm and the husband wants to eat at 8pm sharp? A wife with a career and who has more than one young child with a husband who requires that the house and kids be calm and orderly as well being able to eat his wife’s cooking with at least two dishes.”
She tells women not to get nervous about this or think too much about tiredness and their responsibilities to their husbands and begins to outline the steps to be a perfect wife. She says mindset is important and this should be treated as a game that you’re playing.
If you don’t want to get frustrated reading the whole thing, here are just some of the ridiculous things she said the wife should do before the husband comes back home:
- Eat some snacks on your way back home from work to save time and prevent yourself from being hungry
- Don’t ask your kids to bathe themselves, do it instead in five minutes per kid as your husband likes it when his children are clean
- After you’re done cooking, serve it to your husband and feed your kids but don’t eat the food that you have painstakingly cooked. Instead, talk to your husband because he likes it. If you eat and talk together, there’s a risk you can choke as you’re too busy feeding your kids as well. Your husband likes cleanliness and if you don’t focus on the kids they will make a mess.
- After dinner, make sure to clean the kitchen. During this time, ask the children to sit with their father so that he can spend some time with the kids and is also a gentle way of hinting to your husband that he should look after the kids while you’re busy
- The wife can only eat after the kids are asleep and if you’re on a diet, then you should eat your meal in the car on the way home
- Make sure to get to bed by 11pm and be up before the sun rises!
If you’re like me and wondering that at which point does the husband even help her at all, don’t worry the husband doesn’t. Maybe when she gently hints that he should talk with the kids? Plus, it is also quite unrealistic as there’s no way young children will behave so well that you can bath them in five minutes and the other timelines are impractical as well. Needless to say, this post enraged netizens who poured in with their comments saying how sexist this “guideline” is.
“Well, just order from GrabFood or FoodPanda, there’s no limit to how many dishes you can order. Clean the house? Just open the Grab app and click the Clean and Fix option and book what kinda services you want. Oh and don’t forget to charge everything to your husband’s card!”
“My lecturer was right. The one who judges women and deny them of their rights at the end of the day are women themselves. Just look at their mindset.”
“No kid can behave all the time and neither can any wife work like a robot daily!”
Again, if you expect your wife to do everything herself while you just sit and relax, might as well just hire a maid. To all the wives out there, if you happen to have a husband who doesn’t help out, just think of Marie Kondo and ask yourself, does he bring you joy?